Written by Chris Illuminati
I loved calling her pre-wife. I hope the permanent roommate catches fire as well.
Anyway, when we have leftover dinner, the permanent roommate packs us both a lunch. Since they look identical, she started leaving a Post-It note so I would know which lunch was mine. At first they just said Chris but I guess she got bored with just writing my name. She started writing funny messages. I saved my favorites.
Stephen is our cat. Makes it even funnier.
Two things going on here: I was dying for an iPhone and I was having stomach issues and a day away from finding out I needed emergency surgery.
I eat a lot.