Collected by karj
Operator! Give me the number for 911!
“Me fail English? That’s unpossible.” – Ralph Wiggum
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
“Don’t kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about!” – Troy McClure
“Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me.” “Okay Mr. Burns, what’s your first name.” “I don’t know.”
Aren’t we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.
“My cat’s breath smells like cat food.”
“Homer, lighten up! You’re making happy hour bitterly ironic.” – Moe Syzlak
“Bart, stop pestering Satan!” – Marge Simpson
Ralph Wiggum- I choo choo choose you
Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
“Here’s to alcohol, the cause of-and solution to-all life’s problems.” – Homer
I’m Normally Not a Praying Man, but If You’re up There, Please save Me Superman -Homer
These are hardly the greatest simpsons quotes.
YOU’RE A BLOGGER!!! I love it.
Greetings from Sweden ……………….
I always liked:
“Man alive! There are men alive down here”- Chief Wiggum
“My eyes! The goggles, they do nothing!” by Rainier Wolfcastle who also said “On a big pile fo money with many beautiful women” when The Critic, Jay Sherman, asked him how he slept at night.
How about “I think he’s talking to you” in the Cape Fear episode.
But the ultimate?
“Hello. My Name is Leonard Nimoy. The following story I’m about to tell you is true. And by true, I mean false. It’s lies, all lies. But they’re entertaining lies. And in the end isn’t that the real truth? The answer is no”
“Man alive! There are men alive down here”
I thought that was the CDC guy (or whatever his role was) from Mr Burn’s “slanty drilling operation” during the first half of the “who shot Mr Burns” episode?
I don’t remember who it was, but they were in an enviro suit and they said it when they entered Moe’s bar, which was filled with toxic fumes.
And back to the topic, I liked the bit immediately before that, where Moe says “Hey, if you guys are getting loaded of them fumes, I’m gonna have to start charging you”.
Oh, and Barney burping into the toxic-fumes-meter.
The fanniest simpson quote ever……….
when president arnold schwarzenegger was asked to respond to an article and said: ” i was allected to lead not to read”
THE BEST SIMPSON QUOTE EVER IS…. I HAVE THREE KIDS AND NO MONEY WHY CANT I HAVE NO KIDS AND THREE MONEY
i like the 1
tv teacher, mother, secret lover
This one’s for you, Kaiser Bill. Special delivery from Uncle Sam and all the
boys in D company. Yeah… Johnny, Harris, Brooklyn Bob. And Reggie. Yeah,
even Reggie. He ain’t so stuck up once you get to know hi…
[*** KABOOM ***]
What about “Mmm…unexplained bacon.”
“I probably shouldn’t have eaten that packet of powered gravy I found in the parking lot.”
“Look at them. Watching my TV. Sitting on my couch. You better not be in my ass groove!”
“Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace ’accidentally’ with ’repeatedly’ and replace ’dog’ with ’son.’”
“Bonjour, you cheese-eating surrender-monkeys!”
“They call them fingers but I’ve never seen them fing…Oh, there they go.”
“I gotta go Moe my damn weiner kids are listening.
We are not weiners!”
also; Super Nintendo Chalmers.
all this time i thought googling yourself means the other thing
‘Feels like I’m wearing nothing at all, nothing all nothing, NOTHING AT ALL.’
‘Gahhh stupid sexy Flanders!’
And some lady I can’t remember keeps saying ‘I like that’.
‘HE’S NOT BONO!’
Ohhh I can’t remember all my fave quotes right now…
‘What the — aw, that’s right, they have breakfast at Tiffany’s now.’
“Or what? You’ll release the dogs, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you?”- Homer
“Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace ’accidentally’ with ’repeatedly’ and replace ’dog’ with ’son.’” – Lionel Hutz
“Hello, You will have to speak up i am wearing a towel”
lol simpsons are crazy hehe love it though especially the conversation between bart and krusty “my mum says god never closes a door without opening a window” (krusty) “sorry to say kid but your mums a dingbat” looooool
Love those and
Lisa: mom you said all hitch hickers were drug crazed thrill seekers
Marge: I said all hitch hickers are thrill crazed drug seekers, don’t put words in my mouth
And when lur lean comes back and the family is repeating what large called her
Bart: he ha hoe
*marge not large