Top 20 Unfortunate Lessons Girls Learn From ‘Twilight’

Written by John Scott Lewinski

From a male point of view, the only redeeming feature of the Twilight books and movies is the ammunition they provide against female claims of innate moral superiority over men.

Whenever a woman criticizes a man’s lust, aggression, shallowness or any other lesser angel of his personality, the quick-witted fellow can point to the millions of women addicted to the base, insipid, bad-boy-worshiping, misogynist syrup so many female viewers of all ages knelt to this past weekend, when The Twilight Saga: New Moon raked in $147 million at the box office, setting several records.

(A side benefit: The Twilight films provide good grist for RiffTrax’s movie-mocking mill — see video embedded above.)

In the spirit of speaking truth to diamond-skinned power, enjoy this list of unfortunate lessons girls learn from Twilight. (The list operates under the principle that any grownup female who embraces Twilight’s junior-high dreck temporarily sacrifices her “woman card.”)

And so, with an insincere “love is forever,” we begin.

    twilight_new_moon_poster_05

  1. If a boy is aloof, stand-offish, ignores you or is just plain rude, it is because he is secretly in love with you — and you are the point of his existence.
  2. Secrets are good — especially life-threatening ones.
  3. It’s OK for a potential romantic interest to be dimwitted, violent and vengeful — as long as he has great abs.
  4. If a boy tells you to stay away from him because he is dangerous and may even kill you, he must be the love of your life. You should stay with him since he will keep you safe forever.
  5. If a boy leaves you, especially suddenly (while telling you he will never see you again), it is because he loves you so much he will suffer just to keep you safe.
  6. When a boy leaves you, going into shock, losing all your friends and enduring night terrors are completely acceptable occurrences — as long as you keep your grades up.
  7. It is extremely romantic to put yourself in dangerous situations in order to see your ex-boyfriend again. It’s even more romantic to remember the sound of his voice when he yelled at you.
  8. Boys who leave you always come back.
  9. Because they come back, you should hold out, waiting for them for months, even when completely acceptable and less-abusive alternative males present themselves.
  10. Even though you have no intention of dating an alternative male who expresses interest in you, it is fine to string the young man along for months. Also, you should use him to fix things for you. Maybe he’ll even buy you something.
  11. You should use said male to fix things because girls are incapable of anything mechanical or technical.
  12. Lying to your parents is fine. Lying to your parents while you run away to save your suicidal boyfriend is an extremely good idea that shows your strength and maturity. Also, it is what you must do.
  13. Car theft in the service of love is acceptable.
  14. If the boy you are in love with causes you (even indirectly) to be so badly beaten you end up in the hospital, you should tell the doctors and your family that you “fell down the steps” because you are such a silly, clumsy girl. That false explanation always works well for abused women.
  15. Men can be changed for the better if you sacrifice everything you are and devote yourself to their need for change.
  16. Young women should make no effort to improve their social skills or emotional state. Instead, they should seek out potential mates that share their morose deficiencies and emotional illnesses.
  17. Girls shouldn’t always read a book series just because everyone else has.
  18. When writing a book series, it’s acceptable to lift seminal source material and bastardize it with tired, overwrought teenage angst.
  19. When making or watching a major feature film, you should gleefully embrace the 20 minutes of plot it provides in between extended segments of vacant-eyed silence and self-indulgent, moaning banter.
  20. Vampires — once among the great villains of literature and motion pictures — are no longer scary. In fact, they’re every bit as whiny, self-absorbed and impotent as any human being.

Since the writer of this piece is clearly not female, the list came together only after discussing Twilight at length with women who enjoyed and detested the book and the first two movies. Olivia Dunkley, Vanessa Fewings, Rosie Lewinski and Beth Ann Lewinski contributed to the article.

111 thoughts on “Top 20 Unfortunate Lessons Girls Learn From ‘Twilight’

  1. Mr. Pink

    This crap movie and book series is like Dawson’s Creek with vampires, Translevania 90210, Saved By the Vampire, The Wonder 200 Years, and Hanna Vamptana. For God sakes the Vampires go to high school and are 100 years old. Can you say pedophile?

  2. Rachel

    EVERYTHING IS JUST ABOUT GENDER DIFFERENCES..ITS THE BROADNESS OF MIND THAT MAY PULL THE TRIGGER OF ENTIRELY EMBRACING THE IDEA OF THE WRITER.I LOVE THE MOVIE AND PLANNING TO READ THE ENTIRE SERIES OF IT.

    lesson#5:
    # If a boy leaves you, especially suddenly (while telling you he will never see you again), it is because he loves you
    so much he will suffer just to keep you safe.

    (could that be possible? oh yeah in twilight: new moon, YES it is!!)

    lesson #10:
    # Even though you have no intention of dating an alternative male who expresses interest in you,
    it is fine to string the young man along for months. Also, you should use him to fix things for you.
    Maybe he’ll even buy you something.

    (This is very funny, very realistic ha ah aha ha)

    lesson#12:
    # Lying to your parents is fine. Lying to your parents while you run away to save your suicidal boyfriend
    is an extremely good idea that shows your strength and maturity. Also, it is what you must do.

    (thats the most immature decision i think for a lady to do, BF can come when God allows but PARENTS will remain parents til
    we die)

    lesson#14
    # If the boy you are in love with causes you (even indirectly) to be so badly beaten you end up in the hospital,
    you should tell the doctors and your family that you “fell down the steps” because you are such a silly, clumsy girl.
    That false explanation always works well for abused women.

    (oh yes i agree to that, i mean yes its realistically well shown- pattern of being battered by your own husband/bf)

  3. M Shaw

    I enjoyed the “New Moon” edition of the Twilight series. I didn’t love it; not my type of movie, but I did find it interesting. My wife did love the movie and would like to see it again. All in all, it was a very nice evening.

    I was amused by this review of the movie, and I’m still wondering how serious to take it. I apologies if the review was meant to be tongue in cheek. Assuming that the review was serious, I do have a few comments.

    The Twilight series falls into the category of fantasy and is not reality. Women readily recognize this, and don’t take life lessons from the series. The role of fantasy is not to teach women about life, but to satisfy their unconscious desires. Fantasy plays an important part in many couples sexual life relationship. Instead of trying to find life lessons in the series, you should try to find what unconscious fantasies of women are being fulfilled by the series, as many women are clearly fulfilled by it.

    The first lesson taken from the series is that women crave fantasies of the forbidden relationship. This is what stirs their desire. Freud gave a psychological explanation of this, which I present in my program to stimulate female sexual desire at http://psychicalsolutions.com.

    The second lesson that can be had from this series is that love involves willing sacrifice. Belle sacrificing her safety, Edward sacrificing his association with Belle, demonstrates the greater the love, the deeper the sacrifice.

    When analyzing fantasy, don’t look for lessons by picking apart silly plots or irrational actions by the characters. Instead, try to find what desires deep inside your psyche the writer is trying to satisfy. This is where the true lessons lie.

  4. Michelle

    Well, I’m female and didn’t learn any of the above lessons. I however had my knowledge of true love re-enforced, and learned that sometimes, it’s a woman that saves the day, like Bella does.

  5. Some Guy

    Twilight reinforces the fact that no matter how many times I use girls for my amusement I can always count on more to come and be part of my entertainment/fun :)

  6. Jenn

    One thing I learned from the review is that it’s kinda creepy for a grown man to be writing so passionately, so frustratedly about female teenage angst.

  7. Pffft

    Yeah, like I’m waiting for your follow-up. What Unfortunate Lessons Boys Learn from the Bond, Bourne, Die Hard, Spiderman, Bat Man, X-Men, Transformers etc. series. I guess won’t be holding my breath though. ;)

  8. urethane

    “Yeah, like I’m waiting for your follow-up. What Unfortunate Lessons Boys Learn from the Bond, Bourne, Die Hard, Spiderman, Bat Man, X-Men, Transformers etc. series. I guess won’t be holding my breath though. ;)”

    With thankfully rare and pathological exception, boys don’t grow into their teens, much less manhood, replicating the behaviors seen in any of those characters.

    Sadly, the same cannot be said for teen girls, and many women, re: the mental and emotional deficiencies depicted by the young lady in Twilight. There are GROWN WOMEN (physically grown, anyway) who harbor all 20 of those sorry attitudes about love, and then some. And you know it.

  9. Mad Monica

    THANK you!!! I was beginning to wonder if I was the only one who felt this series was this bad. The whole “he watches me sleep” thing in the first movie/book was bad enough. This one is worse!

    Thank you, thank you, for pointing out the absolutely ATROCIOUS lessons this series teaches impressionable young girls. I am not for censorship, therefore I’m sure we’ll be subjected to more of this yuck for some time to come, but at least there are some voices out there calling it like it is.

  10. A Silver

    A couple of important ones I would add to the list:

    21) True love is based, not on things like shared interests, hobbies, the ability to communicate well and enjoy such communication, mutual respect, etc, but on intense attraction.

    22) Happiness in life can be achieved by making all decisions based on emotional impulses and ignoring all logical arguments against said decisions.

    23) Your father’s input on romantic partners is worthless and you’ll only find your destiny by doing the opposite of what he suggests.

    24) If a romantic partner treats you like a child and makes all the decisions in your relationship, even against your objections, it is because he loves you with all his heart.

    (I only read the books, I’m not entirely sure how clearly the movies demonstrated these ideas)

  11. sanjuro

    The movies remind me of a MADTV skit satrizing teen dramas called PRETTY WHITE PEOPLE WITH PROBLEMS.
    As for what males can learn from SPIDERMAN, TRANSFORMERS etc it’s that you have to be a whining, spoiled loser with a bad case of Peter Pan syndrome to be a hero.

  12. Marsha

    I haven’t read the books or seen the movies, but this confirms my worst fears. Besides, I think it’s perverted to romanticized creatures that need to suck human blood in order to live. I’m just sayin’…

  13. lul

    While quite insubstantial, unimaginative and flat out shallow, I can’t help but be thankful for the Twilight series. Perhaps it will inspire idiots worldwide to someday explore real literature. Reading through some of these comments… perhaps not..

  14. Jenny

    This list is stupid! The fact that you think all females who read the book will behave like the characters show the lack of respect you have for females! Just because its entertaining to read about a crazy romantic triangle does NOT mean everyone is going to emulate the characters. Assuming you read, do you always blindly do everything the characters do? Do you think that MAYBE people will make decisions and form their personalities and character based on influences like their family, friends, religion, culture etc and not on ONE book. Its ENTERTAINMENT not a “how-to” manual and if you think all females (young or old) are going to behave differently in their lives b/c of it you obviously have zero respect for women. Plus, you obviously are in love with Edward and only attack the series b/c of your repressed homosexuality.

  15. Julie

    To this list (courtesy of Karmaa):

    “Vampires:
    are NOT angsty teenagers
    do NOT go to highschool
    DO… NOT…. SPARKLE!!!”

    let’s add the obvious – Vampires DO NOT EXIST!!!

    It’s called fantasy. I fast-forwarded through the first movie, found it uninteresting, and won’t watch or read any more, but I certainly don’t begrudge others the enjoyment of this fantasy (as in obviously not real-life).

  16. Vadept

    Girls do not “learn these things” from Twilight. Saying so assumes they have a magical power over girls that draws them in and then teaches them to behave in a way they would not otherwise have done.

    Rather, the books are interesting BECAUSE of the above points. Girls are not learning these things, they WISH IT WAS SO. Kinda like how in boy-lit, boys are not learning that duels to the death over honor is a good idea, they just wish it was so.

    1. Jen

      I dunno. When I was 13, my friends all learned these habits from romantic movies in general. One girl thought it was PERFECTLY NORMAL to for a 14 year old girl to date a 28 year old man based on SAILORMOON because “Love has no age” she said.

      Many of my friends ended up with emotionally unavailable, abusive, or cheating men later on in life. I think #1 is especially true for a lot of college girls. The point is, SOME GIRLS DO LEARN THESE BAD HABITS! Usually subconsciously and it doesn’t necessarily have to be Twilight, but just bad television in general.

      So speak for yourself.

  17. rcm

    UGH!

    I mean, just think of all those movies where the young men are entranced by a dangerous young woman…or threatened by a dangerous peer…or a dangerous foe…or dealing with a dangerous psychological crisis…or righteously rising up against evil…
    See how this doesn’t totally destroy him but leads him to find a way to reassert HIMself. Or see how it undermines HIM.

    I have to admit that I watch much fewer movies since that day I walked into a Blockbusters and realized that almost all the DVD covers showed the MAN who is the big story.
    Those few where the Woman is the Big story were also those where the fact that the Woman was the Big story was a big part of the story.
    LIke – Look, a strong WOMAN! Look, a sensitive portrayal of a WOMAN.

    I’d actually say this is a rather skewed reflection of reality.
    No wonder people might reflect on which version of this skewed reality is being portrayed in Twilight stories.
    But, I’d also agree with the Vadept’s insight into the Twilight stories being what girls might WISH were true.
    John Render – bodice rippers as opposed to Rambo? scorn one, scorn the other, right?

  18. Kelly

    You forgot to add that it suggests making a permanent decision which possibly includes losing your soul because you really love your high school boyfriend of a few weeks is a great idea.

  19. Kirby

    >>”I’d also agree with the Vadept’s insight into the Twilight stories being what girls might WISH were true”

    That’s the same insight as in the article you’re commenting on. The problem is that it’s a screwed-up thing to wish for and it goes directly contrary to everything women SAY they want.

    Man don’t act out Rambo fantasies. It’s illegal, for one thing. Women do act out the silly nonsense in the bodice rippers, to the misery of all concerned.

  20. ~FR

    (*shrug*)- it’s for teenage girls, relax. Most women learn at some point in their early 20’s that vampirism is probably a good indicator of a guy with an attachment disorder.

    Hopefully guys learn this as well and stop acting haunted and pathetic.

  21. urethane

    “Jenny

    November 27th, 2009 at 15:37

    This list is stupid! The fact that you think all females who read the book will behave like the characters show the lack of respect you have for females! Just because its entertaining to read about a crazy romantic triangle does NOT mean everyone is going to emulate the characters. Assuming you read, do you always blindly do everything the characters do? Do you think that MAYBE people will make decisions and form their personalities and character based on influences like their family, friends, religion, culture etc and not on ONE book. Its ENTERTAINMENT not a “how-to” manual and if you think all females (young or old) are going to behave differently in their lives b/c of it you obviously have zero respect for women. Plus, you obviously are in love with Edward and only attack the series b/c of your repressed homosexuality.”

    A nerve squarely struck, so someone doth protest too much.

  22. rcm

    further comment…

    “Man don’t act out Rambo fantasies. It’s illegal, for one thing.”

    Yeah. No one has to deal with people imagining or wishing themselves to be that kind of unrealistic supermacho.

    But those silly girls make life hell for everyone!

  23. Liv Rit

    WE GET IT. YOU HATE TWILIGHT. STOP BASHING IT, BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE CARES WHAT YOU IDIOTS THINK. IF YOU DON”T LIKE TWILIGHT, GO READ/WATCH SOMETHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  24. whiskey

    The lessons of Batman, Iron Man, Spider-Man, Bourne, Taken, etc. are overall positive for boys and men and Twilight toxic for girls.

    From Batman, Iron Man, Spider-Man, Bourne, etc. are the lessons that men must ENDURE: hardship both physical and emotional, while not expressing emotion, and that physical strength must be tempered by CONTROL. That the world can be often ugly and violent, and a man’s response is to respond in kind to REDUCE the violence (by defeating the villains). Much of the stuff in these movies (and source material) is not about the fighting, rather it is the decision to risk death by DECIDING to fight. Instead of walking away. While still operating within acceptable moral limits.

    Boys need these stories, they tell them how to act to control their superior physical strength and prevent their emotions (just as strong as women) from running them. When a girl gets angry and hits a boy, no big deal, she’s not very strong. Different story for a guy.

    Twilight is not that far off either from all those Rom Cons such as “Awful Truth” or “27 Dresses” or “the Proposal,” fairly toxic messages for girls/women to embrace lust (and a man’s status/power) as markers for romantic decision making. Call them the anti-Jane Austen.

    Men like stories that show them how to channel their strength to win admiration of other men and the girl. Women like stories that show them how to nab the bad boy. There’s your difference.

  25. Kirby

    >>” No one has to deal with people imagining or wishing themselves to be that kind of unrealistic supermacho.”

    Well, no, they don’t.

    Are you trying to make some sort of point?

    >>”all those vampire fantasy things are totally real?”

    Are you really this stupid?

  26. Chris E.

    The male equivalent isn’t action stories. It’s delivering pizza to a sorority who doesn’t have enough money for a tip. These stories are nothing less than pornography for women, and just as destructive in the long term.

  27. jgreene

    Anyone, female or male, who is “enamored” of the Twilight series has the emotional and intellectual age of a preteen to teenage numbskull. Great reading and movie fare for the forever teenagers of today.

  28. Sarattus

    Vampires in their original European form were foul, semi rotten things neither living or dead who initially preyed upon their nearest and dearest. There were whole vampire scares, hysterias and even trials as late as the mid 1700s.
    Stoker’s descriptions of Dracula invoked a rather repellant being. Stoker admitted he modeled the horror of being bitten by Dracula after the understandable 19th Century fear of syphilis infections.
    To be sure the Dracula book and plays and eventually movies “ravished” women from the day of the book’s publication unto this day. I do not understand the phenomena but then I do not understand women – especially the teenage versions.

  29. HC

    ‘The Twilight series falls into the category of fantasy and is not reality. Women readily recognize this, and don’t take life lessons from the series. ‘– M Shaw

    I can’t entirely agree.

    I agree that probably _most_ women readily recognize this…but the message from romantic fantasy movies and novels (not just Twlight) does leave it’s mark, just as the highly sexualized fantasy images young men are presented about women superficially are recognized as fantasy, but do leave an impression.

    IMHO one of the reasons for the high divorce rate is precisely the enormous amount of fantasy-baggage both men and women bring to the table that they absorbed from various elements of popular culture.

  30. HC

    ‘“Yeah, like I’m waiting for your follow-up. What Unfortunate Lessons Boys Learn from the Bond, Bourne, Die Hard, Spiderman, Bat Man, X-Men, Transformers etc. series. I guess won’t be holding my breath though.’ — urethane

    Again, that’s not _entirely_ true. Transformersr is pretty harmless in this sense, but Bond, Bourne, etc do leave a certain influence behind. Not so much the obvious fantasy-stuff as the subtler things, ‘a man is always in control’, ‘women don’t respect you if you’re not tough’, etc.

    It’s the _subtle_ effects that leave their mark on both sexes, not the obvious things.

  31. HC

    ‘From Batman, Iron Man, Spider-Man, Bourne, etc. are the lessons that men must ENDURE: hardship both physical and emotional, while not expressing emotion, and that physical strength must be tempered by CONTROL. That the world can be often ugly and violent, and a man’s response is to respond in kind to REDUCE the violence (by defeating the villains). Much of the stuff in these movies (and source material) is not about the fighting, rather it is the decision to risk death by DECIDING to fight. Instead of walking away. While still operating within acceptable moral limits.’ — whiskey

    That is part of the truth. There are lessons or ‘impressions’ in (for ex) movies like Iron Man that are healthy and constructive…but Tony Stark also can bed any woman he wants within minutes of meeting her, too, Hollywood-lovely girls are pleading for his attention and he doesn’t even have to bother to remember their names, etc.

    This is the male version of the romance-novel. As somebody above noted, romance novels and movies fulfil female fantasies in ways that are not totally different than ‘Wild Hot Cheerleaders in Cancun’ or whatever does for rmales. To some degree this is natural, but it’s all to easy to forget that the real world is _never_ that way, for either sex.

  32. Shanna

    “‘The Twilight series falls into the category of fantasy and is not reality. Women readily recognize this, and don’t take life lessons from the series. ‘– M Shaw”

    I think Women recognize this, and I hope to god teenagers do. I told my 12 year old cousin if her mom ever lets her read them to understand that she does NOT want a boyfriend who acts like Edward.

    I like the twilight books, despite thinking Bella is an idiot, Edward is a stalker and Jacob is annoying. I will never say it’s good literature because it isn’t, the characters do dumb things, but sometimes that IS what is compelling about a series. Who wants to read a series full of perfect people? That is dull too.

    “Men like stories that show them how to channel their strength to win admiration of other men and the girl. ”

    Men also like porn. Really, it’s silly to turn this into a way to bash women. Men read and watch stupid stuff too.

  33. El Cerdo

    Twilight is poorly written drek. The plots are thinner than onionskin, the pacing is horrid. The characters are insipid, shallow, morons. I can understand how tween girls just LOOOOOOVE this crap, a soap opera stare and holding hands ARE TRUE LOVE to them. I cannot understand how Grown Women & ANY HETEROSEXUAL MALE can be a fan of this crap! You want Fantasy? Read frikkin Harry Potter! You want a REAL VAMPIRE?!?!? READ DRACULA!

  34. Taq

    #17 doesn’t belong on the list. “Twilight” does not teach girls this, rather the opposite. That one shouldn’t jump onto the fad bandwagon is a simple fact.

    Replace the word “shoudn’t” with “SHOULD” and the item fits the list.

  35. Jamie

    “You forgot to add that it suggests making a permanent decision which possibly includes losing your soul because you really love your high school boyfriend of a few weeks is a great idea.” That’s the one I was going to add!

    I love Twilight – because I’m 43, happily married, no longer a silly fool of a fourteen-year-old, and it’s full-on escapist drivel to me, fantasy that makes me sigh and get googly-eyed over the impossibility of that particular brand of “true love.” But I’m really glad my daughter’s too young yet to see or read the series in its first wildly popular run. By the time she’s old enough, it’ll no longer be such an overwhelming part of the zeitgeist and she’ll be inoculated against it… if I have anything to say about it!

  36. Katherine

    All it took was a preview of this stupid film, and then I checked it out at a family movie guide to get the basic storyline and said “Nope, don’t need that culty flick”. Suffice to say, our teen is now used to the idea that she won’t be going. It’s also been a good lesson (about not going) that although this is a popular film, popular doesn’t make it good.

    Another poster said it was like a vamp version of Dawson’s Creek. I agree. What’s next, “Desperate Vampires”?!

  37. Clive

    Which ever way you slice it, that vampire Edward is a latent pedophile.
    30 year old man takes interest in teen student = creepy
    300 year old man takes interest in teen student = heart breakingly romantic?!?!

  38. Emily

    mostly jacob’s “things are about to get ugly here” is what cracked me up the most but the whole dysfunctional relationship detailed in this series can be summarized by the very end. bella presses and presses to become a vampire so she can stay young forever with edward and never be apart from him no matter what it takes because oh my gosh she truly loves him and then he says “will you marry me” and the look on her face says…”uh, pardon?” and all the teens in the theater that were gawking and exlaiming “she’s too young to marry him!” ok, but she is not to young to decide to abandon her father and her mother and all sembolance of a mortal life to die and be changed to an immortal damned soul? i laughed so hard. yes girls it is wonderful to be wanted by a guy, but the kind of “love” this series depicts needs to stay in your imagination and never become part of your beliefs on how dating should go. not every girl is going to go out and believe all these points listed but they definitely can become harmful to the young girl who is so desperate for a guy to notice her.

  39. Riki

    The first one, even though guys won’t admit it, is usually true.. I can think of at least 2 guys who teased and threw things at me, who confessed years later that they had a crush on me… but.. this was many years ago.. when I was a teenager

  40. Anna Feruglio Dal Dan

    What most people are missing is that this wonderful list is not a critique of women, it is a list of things girl are generally taught by conservative, mysoginist environment and that USUALLY RESULT IN THEM BEING BEATEN UP BY THEIR HUSBAND FOR THE NEXT THIRTY YEARS.

    Obviously not every girl who watches Twilight will end up in an abusive relationship, but the core beliefs it presents as desirable will increase their danger of doing so.

    And btw, as a young person my formative stories where stories of action, danger and bravery. I read Watership Down and I identified with Hazel. I real Tolkien and identified with… oh, I don’t know, I guess Aragorn. For that matter, I was probably brought up by Gundam more than anything.

    And I’m female.

    Strangely enough, I can’t stand Bond in any incarnation but I loved Bourne passionately. I think it’s because Bourne is both the perfect soldier and somebody who questions the morality of being a perfect soldiers, not intellectually but viscerally.

    This thing that “girls” only watch romantic comedies and “boys” only watch war action hero movies? Bullshit. Girls are taken to see romantic comedies and boys are taken to see war movies.

  41. jack

    There has been a lot of energy fed into this debate.

    Teenagers are going to see questionable things. Our duty is not to stifle the exposure to these ideas rather to give the kids the critical thinking skills to enjoy the entertainment without letting it adversely influence them.

    The article seems to be the work of a misogynist

  42. MichelleW

    Really?? Exactly why are people so set on pointing out all of the faults of these books or movies?? Don’t like it? Don’t read it. Don’t watch the movies. We’re talking about werewolves & vampires here people. I don’t think young girls are going out and using this as their dating bible. There’s a reason it’s called Fiction. Do people spend this much time worrying about other books?? Get a grip.

  43. Zardoz

    Just as the previous generation lapped up all the unrealistic ideas that SEX & THE CITY vomited on our nice linolium kitchen floor, both the current AND previous generation of women are drinking deep from what this trendy, shallow excuse for literature has presented them with.

    And, yes, teenaged girls are more impressionable AND live by this tripe. My advice? Cut lengthwise, not across.

  44. Kate

    Twilight seriously sucks donkey bollocks.

    The whole thing can be summed up as bad judgement. It is also not a very well thought out concept with many loopholes, romanticized depravities and inconsistencies that will come back to bite society in the arse (not the neck).

    Firstly, a 300 year old that is still in high school demonstrates that the US education system is seriously lacking, LOL. I would think 12 years of schooling would be enough. If I were this vampire I would be at university, at least, and already have at least 50 PhD degrees. Talk about a wasted life. Is this guy soulless or brainless? The Twilight series therefore illustrates that education is not that important and it is OK to be stuck in high school for many centuries. Perhaps this is symbolic of our times.

    Secondly, the fact that a 300 year old man falls in love with a teenager is indicative of his emotional immaturity and paedophilic proclivities. He has lived at least 3 lifetimes. Why would he even be attracted to a teenager? I can, more likely, see him hanging around old-age homes making the moves on ladies closer to his age. This too is perhaps symbolic of men’s tendencies to seek younger women.

    I am no Dr Phil but I think it is not OK to be living with your parents if you are that old. Edward is, therefore, a 300 year old melodramatic bum still stuck in high school, living with his parents. This is not cool or attractive. Added to that is his fetish for blood. On what planet are these qualities attractive?

    This book series may be fantasy but the imagination can only be stretched so far! It is less believable than Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings, which I found more entertaining and with a positive message.

    Children (0-19 years old) should not be subjected to this crap.

    This vampire Edward should be staked through the heart with a blunt wooden stake and beheaded. And the over-exposed werewolf should be shot through the heart with a silver bullet. Bella is NOT a good role model and should be committed and have a lobotomy.

    I agree with Jubal, where is Buffy?

  45. Another Kate

    Kate–I love you. Can I marry you? ;-) I quoted your comment all over Twitter ’cause it was so funny!

    Most folks who I respect feel that Bella has already had the lobotomy: “Whiny”, “vapid”, “insipid”, “boring” are some of the words I have heard used to describe her character in New Moon. Not the kind of woman I want my daughter to become! (Though currently “whiny” fits…)

  46. Roxana

    Great article. Don’t listen to the Twitards screaming about how stupid anyone who hates the series is, or to the people who assume that because it’s fiction then it isn’t influential. Fiction, often enough, is more influential that non-fiction. You may think teenage girls won’t take any life lessons from these books, but they will and they have. I deal with fans of the series on a daily basis, and it is ridiculous the kind of things that these girls learn from the series.
    I know of many girls who will acknowledge Edward’s abusive tendencies but will immediately defend him, “Yes he’s abusive and does a lot of bad things, but he does it because he loves her!” In many a fan’s mind, if the act of abuse has love as its motivator then it’s absolutely okay and forgivable. If you don’t believe me, then you haven’t been around enough of the fans.

  47. Alex

    Jack,

    I don’t disagree that part of good parenting isn’t necessarily shielding our youth away from every harmful thing, but teaching them how to analyze it with a critical eye and understand the difference between life and entertainment. The other part of good parenting is also teaching out kids, especially our young ladies in this instance, what is inappropriate to put in their brains to begin with. Just because you can watch a movie and discern that it’s crap doesn’t mean you should keep watching it. Anyone here who doesn’t think that they are affected by what they watch needs to talk to any advertisement agency. If we’re so unaffected by media, then there are 1000’s of companies out there wasting billions of dollars every year trying to sell us their product via commercials on tv.

    So, how is warning girls away from this crap misogynistic? How, is warning anyone away from something you think harmful to them, showing hatred towards them? Your statement really makes no sense to me. Sorry to single you out.

  48. Cc

    I don’t fully agree that teen girls are walking away from the books with those ideas. I think most people who believe that tend to ignore the fact that even Bella spoke about her actions being stupid, unhealthy, or irrational. I guess the same teen girls are going to think living a double life is lovely because of Hannah Montana. Or that girls will think it’s cool to break out in song during bio because of High School Musical. Believe me, there will ALWAYS be those nutty folks who believe that everything is meant to be imitated. But you’ve gotta give some teens more credit than that. It’s almost demeaning.

  49. Pffft

    Thank goodness that as a grown woman I know that I don’t have to live my life “by-your-leave”. My point? I don’t care what men or lil’ boys think of my reading habits.

    Growing up with three brothers, I have read male-dominated novels from a young age — from Tom Sawyer to Bourne and beyond. I have read the Twilight series and enjoyed the evolution of Bella, though I actually like Meyer’s “The Host” a little better.

    Most interesting, strong females are raped, killed off or shelved within the first three chapters of other books dominated by male characters. I know this because I have read them.

    Most notably on this topic, the all or nothing mentality of some posters is astounding. My 17-yr-old daughter can enjoy Jane Austen, Thomas Hardy, JK Rowling, and Stephenie Meyer with equal enthusiasm. Sorry if you are too one-dimensional to accomplish this feat.

    My sci-fi loving son and husband also loved the series — so please, get off your self-righteous high horse.

  50. Steven Mark Pilling

    Another (subtle) lesson of this is that it’s okay for young actresses of dubious reputation to be forwarded in a cult fantasy to young people as role models.

    Ashley Green: Former waitress and now the star of an R-rated horror flick that sounds suspiciously like a rauncified “Twilight”. Sexed-up photos and interviews with “men’s” magazines complement her agenda. Milk it for all it’s worth, Ashley. Your career will probably not survive the series, anyway. Keep that waitress job open.

    Kristen Stewart: Exploited child star from age 8 with a R-rated resume. “K-Stew” has gained undeserved recognition as an actress by virtue of being in the right place at the right time. Still only 19, she’s trying to bolster her future prospects in the time-honored Hollywood fashion of making a darksome, sex-ridden movie between episodes of a relatively clean movie for teens… which will likewise draw in her fanbase by “virtue” of her name. To prove her uncaring nature as to responsibility toward those fans, she’s likewise struck up a partnership (in all those films and in public) with a fallen child star who’s still underaged… further disgracing that kid in the process.

    Dakota Fanning: She’s the kid. At 15, she’s still trying to recover from the infamy that she earned in 2006 by being central to Hollywood’s first overt child porn movie. Now known (predictably) for her erratic behavior and drinking- and having lost the patronage of Steven Spielberg through that movie (“Hounddog”)- she’s had her wagon hitched to K-Stew’s star by her handlers in order to get her profitability back on track. This, however, may prove fleeting after their upcoming film “The Runaways” proves once again that she’s the most exploited sex-toy in Hollywood’s adolescent ranks. Likely fate: Think Tara Reid.

    Great role models for children… courtesy of Lalaland.

  51. Jeff

    It’s funny I stumbled across this, as the timing is perfect. As a father of a pre-teen girl who (like pretty much ALL of her classmates) is infatuated with the series, I have concerns about the movie/books that this article addresses head on. ALSO, because I just finished lunch with two of my buddies. Both single; one frustrated cause he’s not enough of a “bad boy” (read: jerkoff) for any of the attractive single gals around here, and the other is seriously dating a 28 year old with a completely out of touch idealism of how a relationship, work, etc. (read: life) is supposed to go.
    Whether meant for humor or more sincere concern, or best fit – mix of both (as in, it’s really funny – cause it’s so damn true). This article does hit the growing problem of our society head on. It is fiction, fantasy, made up entertainment…however, it creates wishes & dreams of such “deep love” and heated contraversial passion – within SOME peoples’ lives. And a warning of caution or even just the reminder that – it’s fake – is a good idea.

    Fact is our society craves this lusty fantasy life, in fact, really all societies have. In the history of the world we’ve always have “sinful” desires – which have led to lying, cheating, stealing, killing – by those who fantasized a little too much and decided to bring that romantisized love/power/control/high into their actual life. Typically it’s happened from a persons “moral compass” (if you will) breaking down. As a conservatively moral society gets more and more liberal in the acceptance and desensitized to certain things that are “wrong” – as seen by the “norm” of that society.
    Today our kids talk back & say things that as a kid I would have been spanked without mercy for. Divorce, seperation, or even just cheating on a spouse was looked at so fiercely 20, 30, & especially 40-50+ yrs ago – while today it’s just a “geez, too bad it didn’t work out” thing.

    Some take this stuff too seriously, and some too lightly (as illustrated by the full gamut of reactions above). I do let my daughter read the books and watch the movie; however we have had conversations (notice the plural) about reality and fiction. What type of relationships she really deserves and should crave in REAL life, and to keep an anchor to real-life as she enjoys the time she spends with the entertainment of literature and hollywood’s fantasy worlds.

  52. Jean

    Kate,
    I liked your comment overall, but I feel the need to nit-pick. Please don’t take it personally, it’s merely intended to direct the thought into more arguments, and more detailed arguments.

    First off, I saw the first one (New Moon, I guess?). Second, with a 45-going on 10 year old, and a 14-year old in the house, not like I had a LOT of say in the matter… :-)

    I thought it was OK… Same old cr@p, you see it in Forever Knight, Blood ties, Kindred: The Embraced, etc.

    To add to it: A Vampire’s association with Blood is a rare thing; most vampires don’t do blood, except in western pop culture. (Breast milk -> starve the baby; other viscera -> cause illness, etc.)

    The danger is part of the female excitement. It is quite literally the same as a boy’s idealization of Rambo, just the other side of the coin. (BN: Rambo did NOT get the girl.) So, too, is the “control” aspect – she wants license to act as she feels – and women think Men act that way. (Ladies, we can get our teeth knocked out – and that’s a GOOD loss, it can be far worse.)

    Anyway, to Kate’s comment:

    Twilight seriously sucks donkey bollocks. [Me - Ehhh... Mad Max, The Black Hole, et al, not so dissimilar in literary or film quality.]

    The whole thing can be summed up as bad judgement. It is also not a very well thought out concept with many loopholes, romanticized depravities and inconsistencies that will come back to bite society in the arse (not the neck). [Agreed.]

    Firstly, a 300 year old that is still in high school demonstrates that the US education system is seriously lacking, LOL. I would think 12 years of schooling would be enough. If I were this vampire I would be at university, at least, and already have at least 50 PhD degrees. Talk about a wasted life. Is this guy soulless or brainless? The Twilight series therefore illustrates that education is not that important and it is OK to be stuck in high school for many centuries. Perhaps this is symbolic of our times.

    [IIRC, Edward et al dissappear for a while - probably a generation - then come back and re-live life. It's parallel stasis: They do the same things ove and over, though in different places. Don't think they mentioned the other "nest". But, 1. he's not in HS all the time, 2. he supposedly had been well-educated in multiple disciplines, 3. who wants a wrinkled old lady for anything...? Sorry, it's a core element of a man: to want the young, beautiful, MOLDABLE female, who will cleave to him, and become part of him and his life. Having dated a woman who tried to do that to me - the converse - older woman molding younger man - not so good, for either. Man doesn't WANT to re-make himself to suit her, especially not if he is an adult. Niether does a fully adult woman, though - hence the hormone surge when we are young and stupid, to promote animal reproduction and ensure continuance of the bloodline.

    Now, why - if they can do such things as accumulate wealth over millennia and still adapt to modern life, cell phones, computers, etc. - he BOTHERS with HS might be a good question. Go to college, where people don't think much about blackouts, the girls are mostly sluts and whores (if you go the right?wrong place), start a coven... Etc. Living the good life, and still sort of learning, maybe. Again, THAT depends on where you go, too, and has an inverse relation to what type of girls you find there.]

    Secondly, the fact that a 300 year old man falls in love with a teenager is indicative of his emotional immaturity and paedophilic proclivities. He has lived at least 3 lifetimes. Why would he even be attracted to a teenager? I can, more likely, see him hanging around old-age homes making the moves on ladies closer to his age. This too is perhaps symbolic of men’s tendencies to seek younger women.

    ["Emotionally Mature" women are also "physically mature" usually... Meaning octagenarians. See above. Don't hate us 'cause we're beautiful... We love you because YOU are beautiful, and that's the only thing you have to work with. We don't see your intelligence, we see your... You know.
    OTOH, I can go past a HS "Car Wash" supporting the Cheerleaders, and not even notice. They're children to me. I'm 34. Look at them the wrong way, I can go to jail. Maybe an 18-year old, or better, 21... And then she STAYS 21- AH! There's the rub - Womanly vanity (and male desire) being frozen in time, forever the same - she gets to see everything, do everything, and still be the beautiful teenager for all eternity. And she STILL gets to be Belle of the Ball when she's 80. Men want the same, I admit - to always be at the physical peak would be great. But at the heart of the Vampire concept has been the loss of humanity, and the "stasis" effect on mind on body. IE, get turned in 1880, and it is ALWAYS 1880, even if the average person wears a jumpsuit and carries a plasma rifle, you'll still use a revolver and carry a sword-cane, while wearing an evening tuxedo....

    Women, please understand: your youth and innocence are the only currency you have. Once they are expended, men aren't interested, except for a F-and-chuck. THAT should be taught as "sex Ed" in grade school, forget the mechanics. I didn't need to know how to use a condom, or what a vagina looked like, or where the birth canal was; but to know that women responded to DOMINANCE instead of supplication would've been nice. I was told the exact opposite, brought up to be a "nice" guy.]

    I am no Dr Phil but I think it is not OK to be living with your parents if you are that old. Edward is, therefore, a 300 year old melodramatic bum still stuck in high school, living with his parents. This is not cool or attractive. Added to that is his fetish for blood. On what planet are these qualities attractive?

    [Again - those aren't his biological parents, as I understand; he has to live the lie; safety in numbers, from other vampires, werewolves, hunters, demons, et al. which may or may not exist in her cosmology, I dunno how her universe works. But looking like a teenager is a great way to get lots of sweet, energy-rich, hormone-drenched blood... Or other. So blending in makes for a great hunting grounds... Think PREDATOR, that's what a vampire is, an "ultimate predator".]

    This book series may be fantasy but the imagination can only be stretched so far! It is less believable than Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings, which I found more entertaining and with a positive message.

    [Hairy Rotter sucks "Big Fat Donkey Bollochs" as someone put it. ;-)
    Not sure about the positive messages, either. Good does NOT always triumph over evil; the sheeple like their pretty lies, and will defend them to the death. Yours, if possible. QV Salem, Auschwitz, Inquisition, etc.]

    Children (0-19 years old) should not be subjected to this crap. [Nor shuold adults, though adults should be allowed to have an occasional "candy bar" if you will.]

    This vampire Edward should be staked through the heart with a blunt wooden stake and beheaded. And the over-exposed werewolf should be shot through the heart with a silver bullet. Bella is NOT a good role model and should be committed and have a lobotomy.

    [Such violence! ;-) I'd leave the first two alone, and go after the girl... She's the ultimate responsible party; Edward is a vampire; like a mosquito, he is what he is. The Werewolf is what he is by birth. No choice, But BELLE (Bella?) MAKES choices. IE, it's the feminist cr@p in microcosm - Belle has the choices, the boys have to defend her for her choices, and from the results of those choices, or they're not "real men" The males are ALL stock characters as far as I can tell, and the whole WORLD revolves around Belle and her tingly gina. Maybe the African tribes were on to something when they started circumcisions... :-( ]

    I agree with Jubal, where is Buffy?
    [COTC Jubal? Just in case - Think Black Knight instead of White. It happens when you get burned to a cinder.]

    [BTW, the film version of Buffy at least put her in the position of making decisions, and those decisions affected others, leading to better behavior on her part. Twilight seems to let Belle off the hook for EVERYTHING. And a dhampir would make an interesting character, but probably would be distorted worse than the other characters.]

  53. Anne

    AMEN to Anna Feruglio Dal Da!

    Here’s another lesson to add to the list, a lesson that our culture internalizes and propagates through all kinds of media – books, TV, movies, advertising, music:

    Sex that is violent – even potentially lethal – is erotic. Women desire sexual violence.

    To everyone raging that Twilight is just a fantasy – of course women can tell the difference between fantasy and reality. But can’t you imagine messages reinforcing misogynistic ideas, which we are subject to each and every day in our art, media, education, religions, work, even language – having even a little effect on how women and men (yes, men are reading Twilight) view themselves and each other?

    We don’t need to ban books like Twilight or stop reading them, but we do need to read them critically.

  54. student

    number one its just a story…

    number two the reason why women and girls want it is cause it has romance that they are obviously lacking in their lives….

    number three men for the most part from what I hear from my female friends aren’t romantic..their idea of romance is “honey lets do it” no kiss no hug and five minutes later…well you get the idea( and this is not one night stands this is husbands and monogamous boyfriends I am discussing)

    this series and the movies are a great distraction,a distracting that is there because obviously something is missing. because women are depressed and I believe dissastisfied with the lack of romance and excitement in their lives.

    it fulfills their need for romance,drama and excitement that they obviously are not geting at home..it is OUR PORN>…OK…..our frigging PORN! guys can hide in the bathroom with their dirty mags and husbands can scan the internet for perfect barely legal women who have obviously never had kids,eaten real food and are possibly cosmetically enhanced…well guess what now women have their PORN to,they can now read books and watch movies and listen to crooning songs that fulfill what they are obviously not getting at home….

    For years if not decades men in my oppinion for the most part secretly or publically croon and chase after perfect women,often half their age…..they look for flawless perfect objects of their sexually attraction and if they are unable to attain them they stare at their commputer their porn flick or their dirty mags like a fiend imaginaning they are with them……

    well now the tables have turned and women now have their porn,and they can imagine they are bellla and for a single moment enjoy the fake romance and angst thru her fabricated eyes…..ITS PORN,its a fantasy ……it brings sad women joy in a world where they cook,clean,work,slep kids and put up with a selfish mans bull shit……
    its the second best thing since the vibrator that was created just for us to fill the little gaps in our miserable little lives since harlequin romances and soap operas….

    men can resent them
    feminists can pick them apart and debate them….

    but its a free friggign country and if I get off by reading a book or watching a movie here or there because I am emotionally barren and bored or some chic in an awful marriage reads them to fill the vacum versus divorcing the smuck who makes her absoloutly miserable while she watches him spend enormous time infront of the computer crooning over porn bots while ignorning her….well good for her….

    men have football,baseball,and porn….

    we have vibrators,soap operas and twilight!

    just get over it.

  55. HC

    student said:

    “this series and the movies are a great distraction,a distracting that is there because obviously something is missing. because women are depressed and I believe dissastisfied with the lack of romance and excitement in their lives.

    it fulfills their need for romance,drama and excitement that they obviously are not geting at home..it is OUR PORN>…OK…..our frigging PORN!”

    Yep. That’s precisely accurate. It’s only a problem if women forget (as males too often do) that this sort of thing NEVER applies in actual reality. Life _does_, inherently, lack drama and excitment most of the -time, that’s its nature. It’s what drives both the male and female fantasy industries.

    (For that matter, it’s good that life is that way. Drama is exhausting on a day-in, day-out basis.)

    Twilight and the other forms of fantasy-product are problematic only if their fans forget that life never is and cannot ever be like that. Unfortunately, some do forget just that.

  56. Somebody

    I disagree.
    This post is for men who love bashing anything ‘romantic’ or ‘no shooting and killing people and bedding every single thing with legs’.

    This is merely a romantic FANTASY story which has a larger number of female fans than men. This is a perfect example that sexism has and never will die… And the series is popular because the character of Bella is not all together ‘finished being written’ and we as readers fill up her other characteristics with our own, so thats why so many girls feel in some way or another connected with the series, that is what makes it a person experience for them.

    Im all ready for your bashing, but people who have read the series at least can and for the record Im not a teenager.
    If you dislike it so much why do you take so much interest and time to bash it… but hey… whatever makes you happy

  57. Naallah

    I’m a teenage girl…….and most, if not all my friends are enamored of Twilight. Let’s face it- Twilight is CRAP. It has almost no plot, very poor character development, and even worse, the characters do nonsensical things for absolutely no good reason. I’ve been literally attacked more than twice for stating these obvious facts to my obsessed friends……..

    This post is the best- It’s true. These notions are exemplified by Twilight, and many mindless teenage girls follow it without question. And seriously, SPARKLE in sunlight?! SPARKLE?! Stephanie Meyer has insulted the fantasy image of vampires- She has no imagination! She has turned one of the most mysterious and feared characters into a mushy, pathetic retard! And what’s with Jacob looking like a cute, bone-catching puppy in the movie?!

    Seriously girls, get a grip. Twilight is fantasy- IT WILL NEVER BE REAL SO STOP IMAGINING IT TO BE THAT WAY. Edward is not real, nor will he ever be. Deal with it. Keep the fantasy where it belongs…..IN THE NOVEL.

  58. lc

    i totally agree with every single thing you said! at least i know there are other people who don’t like twilight too:) bella is a disgrace to women… it’s as if she can’t stand on her own two feet,she’s too dependent on edward. i just want to slap every female who idolizes her:|:|

  59. anonymous

    I LAUGHED when I saw some girls saying that Twilight is meant for entertainment. The very fact that they are actually entertained by such nonsensical claptrap seriously worries me about their IQs. Hey, ever tried reading Lord of the Rings or Les Miserables? It might do you some good.

  60. AuroraMoon

    I'm female, and I agree with this completely!! Twilight is just so fucked up on many levels and I loathe those who made it “popular”.

    I'm also an equal rights activist, and I can't help but roll my eyes at women who claim that women are better over men, and the tired women VS men thing.

    Women can be just as sexist as men are, and corrupted man-haters are the reason why men now are on unequal footing with women when it comes to the courts and the law.
    A good father can't even gain custody of his kids, they'll deffer to the abusive, drug-using mother just simply because she's a woman. I've actually seen that shit happen, and that needs to STOP.

    We all have our own weaknesses and strengths as humans…. and this is what makes us equal to each other, and neither one is superior over the other for this same reason.
    Those with an superiority complex seriously need to be put into their place and just STFU.

  61. micro sd card

    I am pretty sure that the simple desire to see one of these films is an indication that these girls are already more help, learn to care regardless of films can give (or not) is only a concern for the proximity stable doors, horse fell on the tank.

  62. Transvestite911

    A surface analysis of these quotes reveals Bella as a self-effacing female. However, further consideration of the constant references Bella makes throughout the series about not being capable, about her feelings of estrangement, and of her sense of inferiority can be read as her internalization of the negative messages patriarchal culture offers to women.
    Transvestite Phone Sex

  63. AJ

    And its not creepy for a bunch of middle aged women to also be fawning over this film and their teen aged male stars like their younger counterparts? Yeah…thats just creepy as hell but apparently accepted because of the dynamic of the film. Double standard much?

  64. Acne Scar Treatmnt

    And its not creepy for a bunch of middle aged women to also be fawning over this film and their teen aged male stars like their younger counterparts? Yeah…thats just creepy as hell but apparently accepted because of the dynamic of the film. Double standard much?

  65. BarfonTwilight

    The Twilight series is not only a piece of literary crap, but a piece of literary crap WITH sparkling vampires. What has our world come to? Obsessing over “Edward” (which he is a fictional character and he will NEVER LOVE YOU) and slitting wrists to show love? What kind of love is that? That's just sick and twisted. Thank you, Twilight, for showing us the true definition of ABUSIVE LOVE!!!!

  66. WebVisible

    No wonder people might reflect on which version of this skewed reality is being portrayed in Twilight stories.
    But, I’d also agree with the Vadept’s insight into the Twilight stories being what girls might wish were true.

  67. Cindy Margott

    Strangely enough, I can’t stand Bond in any incarnation but I loved Bourne passionately. I think it’s because Bourne is both the perfect soldier and somebody who questions the morality of being a perfect soldiers, not intellectually but viscerally.

  68. Oliver

    or, maybe, just maybe, this is an addition written about a very popular, but still rubbish (if you wana see how REAL vampires act, watch interview of the vampire), film. -Shock Horror- and too all the other guys on here, for shame, why would you comment on something to do with twilight ? -ima a hipopcrite,im allowed to comment :P – … and if any guys here watched twilight, (possibly acceptable ONLY if your gf has threatened you with the saucepan in the sink to watch it, again) then hang your heads in shame,

Leave a Reply