{"id":1470,"date":"2010-02-02T09:00:11","date_gmt":"2010-02-02T16:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bspcn.com\/?p=1470"},"modified":"2010-02-01T22:01:26","modified_gmt":"2010-02-02T05:01:26","slug":"15-worst-birthday-gifts-to-give-your-girlfriend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/2010\/02\/02\/15-worst-birthday-gifts-to-give-your-girlfriend\/","title":{"rendered":"15 Worst Birthday Gifts to Give Your Girlfriend"},"content":{"rendered":"

Written by Manolith<\/a><\/p>\n

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As we state often, there are always exceptions to every rule, but some things are fairly universal. Women tend to hold their own birthdays in high regard; there\u2019s the happy party vibe, and there\u2019s the mild self-loathing that accompanies her feeling of getting one year older. It\u2019s a tense time for any would-be gift giver, to be sure. There are certain things that guys simply should not<\/em> get their girlfriends for their birthdays, however \u2014 unless she explicitly asks for them. Some could get a guy slapped, and some might hurt not for what they could get him, but for what he won\u2019t be getting<\/em> after giving them. These are the 15 worst birthday gifts to give a girlfriend; don\u2019t make any of these mistakes.<\/p>\n

Any Household Appliance<\/h5>\n

\"01\"<\/p>\n

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Nothing says romance like a vacuum cleaner. You may think you\u2019re being thoughtful, but the sight of a brand new toaster, vacuum, iron, and so on is tantamount to saying \u201chow about you clean up your dump of an apartment.\u201d Unless she\u2019s in genuine need of one of these things, and asks for it, this is not what you want to hand her on that special day.<\/p>\n

Acne or Wrinkle Creams<\/h5>\n

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We see women spend ridiculous amounts of money and time on facial creams, exfoliants, complexion repair treatments, \u201cage-defying\u201d lotions and all the other things they gobble up on a regular basis. Some of us might get the bright idea to get a girl some of this stuff for her birthday, thinking it\u2019s normal and apparently appreciated. We\u2019d be wrong. Getting a girl anything but scented lotions is like saying she needs some work done, and she\u2019s not likely to appreciate that<\/em> very much.<\/p>\n

Gym Membership<\/h5>\n

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This should be a no-brainer, but it happens. Guys run into the problem fairly often; their girl gets a little lazy with work and school and setting aside relaxation time, or there\u2019s just too many shots and not enough laps \u2014 whatever the case may be, getting her a gym membership is not<\/em> the answer. It\u2019s liable to get you slapped if you\u2019re not careful (duck fast) and there\u2019s really no way around the fact that it\u2019s pretty insulting.<\/p>\n

Nose Hair Trimmer<\/h5>\n

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As odd as this sounds, it\u2019s happened more times than should ever be counted. Usually as part of a bigger package, lazy guys make the mistake of not accounting for the unisex nature of travel kits<\/em>. It\u2019s bad enough that you\u2019re handing your girlfriend a totally insincere, last minute \u201cgift,\u201d but having a nose hair trimmer<\/em> as part of the deal is like a slap to the face \u2014 something you should probably expect if you try this one.<\/p>\n

A Cook Book<\/h5>\n

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Much like the household appliances, this screams anything but<\/em> romance. In fact, what it says most is \u201cget to the kitchen and make me sandwich.\u201d You may as well hand her some oven mitts, an apron, and a bag of flour while you\u2019re at it. As nice as it\u2019d be, we don\u2019t live in the world of Mad Men<\/em>, and you\u2019d be safer taking her out to dinner instead of giving her instructions on how to make you<\/em> dinner.<\/p>\n

A Bikini Wax Kit<\/h5>\n

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This says \u201cI don\u2019t like the way your whole crotch looks, and I\u2019d like you to change that for me.\u201d Not exactly the romantic message you want to send to a girl on her birthday, is it? A gift certificate to an expensive, full service salon\/spa that also offers<\/em> bikini wax services is a better bet. You never know, while she\u2019s there, she may decide on her own to go ahead and trim the grounds.<\/p>\n

Facial Hair Remover<\/h5>\n

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These things, hilarious as they may be, are all the rage right now among women. They apparently do work for all sorts of things, but women don\u2019t generally react well to guys suggesting they use them. You may think you\u2019re being clever in getting her a useful tool to use in her never ending quest for beauty, but she\u2019ll think you\u2019re telling her she has a mustache and a unibrow.<\/p>\n

A Stripper Pole<\/h5>\n

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No matter how much she may flirt with the idea of getting one of these things, her birthday is not<\/strong> the day to present her with one. If she decides she wants a stripper pole, an event for which the odds are decidedly against<\/em>, then feel free to offer to buy her one when that time comes. Just don\u2019t be that guy who gives his girlfriend a stripper pole for her birthday; you\u2019ll never hear the end of it.<\/p>\n

Workout Videos<\/h5>\n

Somewhat like the stripper pole, these ridiculous things are often talked about by women who are fully aware of how dumb they are, but still find some recreational and exercise value in them. The thing is, you can\u2019t just up and give her one of these workout DVDs, and you definitely can\u2019t do it on her birthday. It\u2019s basically saying \u201cyou could use this, you\u2019ve been letting yourself go.\u201d<\/p>\n

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Expensive Diet Plans<\/h5>\n

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You watch her eat like a bird, she\u2019s picky as hell, she wants to lose five pounds, she eyes every diet in every magazine, and so on, and so on<\/strong>. It doesn\u2019t matter what she says or thinks, you\u2019re not supposed to agree with her in the first place, much less force any sort of diet on her. Even if you spend $1000 on some fancy, wholly ridiculous diet plan and hand it to her, you\u2019re still saying \u201cyou\u2019re fat, eat this instead, fatty<\/strong>.\u201d<\/p>\n

Tickets to an Event You Want to Attend<\/h5>\n

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This is usually pretty hilarious to watch take place, but painful at the same time. It goes something like this: Guy wants to go to game\/concert\/fight\/etc. Girl wants to go see [insert any female singer\/songwriter] live in concert. Guy doesn\u2019t listen and\/or care and buys \u201cher\u201d a pair of extremely expensive tickets to the event that he<\/em> wants to see, and hands them to her acting like he just gave her an amazing gift. She struggles not to strangle him, thinks he\u2019s an idiot, and she\u2019s right<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Anything for Her Car<\/h5>\n

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You might think you\u2019re being super helpful and cute by getting her something for her car; maybe it\u2019s a set of matching seat covers or maybe it\u2019s a GPS navigation unit, or even a new sound system that makes your own look like crap. News flash:<\/strong> Chicks don\u2019t really care. If it\u2019s some sort of interior add-on, she\u2019s probably not going to like the color, because she would rather choose it herself or not buy it at all. If it\u2019s electronics, then she probably won\u2019t see the use in it since her stuff works just fine, or she\u2019ll use it like it\u2019s cheap OEM garbage and completely waste the money you spent on it. Just leave her car alone, it\u2019s not worth going there.<\/p>\n

The Walgreens Special<\/h5>\n

\"13\"<\/p>\n

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Evidence that a guy completely forgot or blew off his girlfriend\u2019s birthday until the very last minute, the Walgreens Special<\/em> is simple: You hit up Walgreens or any drug store that lies between work and home, and raid the place for anything and everything that could possibly fill the gaping hole that should be filled with a real<\/em> birthday present.<\/p>\n

A Card with Money<\/h5>\n

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What are you, her grandfather<\/em>? Nothing says love like a wad of cash, right? Giving her money for her birthday is basically treating her like a prostitute, and that\u2019s how she\u2019ll feel. You may as well leave it on the nightstand, and give her a slap on the ass while you\u2019re at it. Don\u2019t be her John, be her boyfriend<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Nothing at All<\/h5>\n

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While, in most cases, she won\u2019t even say a word should you get her absolutely nothing for her birthday, this is the absolute worst thing you could<\/em> do. Even if she swears up and down for three months beforehand that she doesn\u2019t want a present from you, you should attempt to find some way to honor her wishes but go against them at the same time \u2014 even if it\u2019s a single flower, or taking her out to dinner. Just don\u2019t blow it off like you got away with something, she\u2019ll remember it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Written by Manolith As we state often, there are always exceptions to every rule, but some things are fairly universal. Women tend to hold their own birthdays in high regard; there\u2019s the happy party vibe, and there\u2019s the mild self-loathing that accompanies her feeling of getting one year older. It\u2019s a tense time for any […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1470"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1470"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1470\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1471,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1470\/revisions\/1471"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1470"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1470"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1470"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}