Written by Natty

So you’ve decided that going to bars kind of sucks.   It’s not that you’re having so many one night stands that you are tired of getting laid all the time.  It’s that you kind of want something more.  So you end up joiningMatch or whatever site you choose and try to meet that special someone.

Little did you know this is an entire world unto itself.  Personally I like online dating as that’s how I met my wife.  It’s easier, cuts out all the bullshit and you can definitely get laid if you want to.  Yay!

But if you are serious about being successful in online dating then I would suggest you follow these five rules….

1. Use an Accurate “Less Good” Picture of Yourself

I can’t tell you how many faux pictures there are out there of girls online.  It’s like they want you to think they’re hot in the picture and then you meet them, see that they’re not and you’re not supposed to care?  Wrong.   What I would recommend is that you get a picture of yourself that is slightly LESS good looking than you are in real life.  That way if they’re attracted to that picture you’re golden on a first date.   Undersell and over deliver.    Don’t do it the other way around.

2. Become a Picture Wizard

Learn the ropes in identifying pictures of the opposite sex.  A couple of key points.   If a girl only posts pictures of her face?  She doesn’t have a good body.  Same with guys.   Look for way too much airbrushing or makeup.    You want pictures with barely any make up because then you’ll have a clearer picture.  You must master picture identification.

3. Learn to be funny on IM

This is your intro folks.  Most likely you’ll be chatting it up with someone.   Using IM conversations is a great way for you to have time to think of what to write.  Don’t screw it up.

4. Be Simple, and Don’t Scare them off

Remember, you haven’t met these people yet.  I’ve had girls tell me they want to get married, have kids, etc etc.   I guess there’s merit in telling the truth right off the bat but wait a couple of dates for that stuff.  It’s really not necessary at the beginning.   Don’t get too deep too fast unless you really click on that first date.

5. For God’s Sake Don’t Lie

Don’t say you’re 5’10 and wind up being 5’0 tall.   HOW in the world do people do this?

Bonus: Do you know the meaning of Alphabetic letter’s?

Written by Steve DiCarlo

College relationships are a pain in the ass on both ends. But while there are lists all over the internet of things college girls wish their men did differently, there are significantly fewer websites which feature requests that college guys have for their women. Girls, hate to break the bad news, but you aren’t without flaws either. Here’s a list of a few things us guys want you to stop doing…immediately. If you want us to change… we expect you to follow suit.

1. Invading Our Privacy

That text your boyfriend just got? It was from his buddy Slappy who is drunkenly texting, whilst humping a telephone pole, outside of the local bar. It wasn’t from another woman. If you can’t trust your boyfriend enough to not ask him “Who was that?” or “Are you talking to that whore from your philosophy class?”, then it won’t be long before he is talking to that whore from his philosophy class. Not every call or text is from a girl, and even if it is, it doesn’t mean he’s fucking her. So seriously, stop asking.

2. Calling Us ‘Cute’

Puppies are cute. So are babies. But guys don’t want to be ‘cute’ – ‘cute’ is the kiss of death. It is basically saying, “Aw, look at you, aren’t you precious!” Why would we wanna hear the same thing from you, that our bat-shit-crazy old aunts say at family reunions. And for heaven’s sake, don’t call our dicks ‘cute.’ They hate that word even more so than we do.

3. Licking Our Ears

I guess I can’t speak for all guys on this, but come on. I’ll never get why girls think this is an acceptable form of foreplay. Ears aren’t cleaned out as often as they should be. Licking them might feel good for a few seconds, but then your tongue just tastes like earwax. Utilize your mouth for something else. There’s no earwax on our junk.

4. Sending Emoticons

Some girls think receiving hearts ( <3 ) and kissy faces ( ;-* ) in text messages is some sort of extreme turn-on for guys. It’s not. In fact, it’s fucking annoying. Use your words. Sexting is awesome (albeit complicated when you get those steamy messages whilst in the middle of a two-hour college class on political science), but only when done correctly.

5. Talking to Our Families Without Us

Every guy wants a girl he can bring home to mom…sort of. But no guy wants his girlfriend to have a better relationship with his mother than he does. Don’t send our families Christmas presents, or call to ask how things are going without consulting us first. This is college; I don’t talk to my parents and neither should you.

6. ‘Testing’ Us

Girls, don’t pretend you’ve never done it. You’ve all pulled the classic “Oh, it’s fine, we don’t have to hang out tonight. Go chill with your friends”, just to later be pissed about it. We’re tested enough in college; we don’t want to deal with that shit when we’re out of class too. Just tell us how you really feel – don’t expect us to know what you’re thinking at all times. If you’d stop being such a secretive, manipulative bitch, maybe we’d actually want to hang with you instead of our boys.

Bonus: Dear Boyfriend

Challenge accepted.

Source