Written by regretfulmorning
I get shit on quite a bit by female readers (usually via email) calling me a sexist pig and what not for the “fat chick” and “dirty whore” jokes I make. While they are mostly right, I need to point out that I love chubby girls. Yes you, chick who said I show nothing but “plastic bitches” on this site, I’m talking to you.
The reason “men’s entertainment” sites don’t show hefty women anymore, is because they aren’t in demand.Supply and demand. This site is 72% men, and in almost 3 years I’ve only had a handful of people make comments about liking ‘the chubbies.’ RM readers demand hot sluts with big tits, and I supply them.
Today however, I’m going to make my case for the larger ladies. Yes you in the back row who can finish a Porterhouse steak, and clear a motherfucking swimming pool when you cannon ball, I got your back (or a fraction of it at least lol).
Not Afraid To Eat
It’s boring when you sit down at a nice restaurant and your date orders a garden salad. Yea it’s cheaper, but if we weren’t ready to pay for a Filet Mignon, we wouldn’t have asked to take you out. A big girl is likely to clean her plate (and yours) and have enough room for dessert. Eating alone is no fun.
Less Likely To Be Conceited
Super hot girls who get hit on constantly, are stuck up beyond belief. Comments like “Hey I like your hair today” get laughed at and grazed over. They’ve also got entire cell phone full of guys who want to bang them. That means, even if you do end up dating her, she’s liable to be getting drilled by 2 or 3 other fleshrockets at the same time.
Will Give You A BJ That You Won’t Ever Forget
Every single guy who read this and experienced it is smiling right now. I asked my dad a few years ago “Hey dad, why do fat girls give better head?” This is when he told me that they will work a lot harder to keep their man. A model can get whoever she wants, so why perfect the art? My dad is smart, so we’re going to use this as an acceptable answer.
Do you ever like to wrestle around with your girl? Maybe throw her in an armbar or choke hold while you’re watching a UFC event on TV? Damn right you do, it’s fun. Kinda like body slamming a little brother into the couch cushions when your parents weren’t looking. Anyway, I have found that girls with a little bit of weight on them, can dish it out and take it too. Sure they might be out of breath after 30 seconds of grappling, but at least they won’t cry about you messing up their hair.
Will Keep You In Shape
I don’t even know how to explain this next part without getting graphic. You know how when you go down on a girl, sometimes you put your hands under her butt cheeks to lift her towards you? Well, try doing that with a girl who weighs over a buck ninety. It’s hard. And if you look at your biceps while doing so, you’ll see that they’re getting all pumped up. Are we on the same page yet? A meal and a workout all in one.
Warmer When It’s Cold Out
It’s the winter time right now, and winter sucks balls. Nights are long, unpleasant and nippy. You can remedy this with a girl that has a few rolls. Let’s say your arm is cold: Simply snuggle up behind her (spooning style) and slip your arm in between her chub folds. Instant body heat.
Conclusion: Haters gonna hate, but I’m not one of them, and you shouldn’t be either. I am also a firm believer in “Don’t knock it till ya try it.” So gentlemen, next time you feel like shunning a girl at the bar because she weighs more than you will ever be able to benchpress, think back to this article and keep an open mind.